The human rant:

I hate humans.

Need a reason? No worries. I have tonnes. Humans are pesky, hypocritical, self-worshipping, money-minded, hard-headed creatures that are currently destroying the earth because they are pesky, hypocritical, self-worshipping, money-minded and hard-headed.

And yeah, by using the term "human", I'm referring to myself too, no need for those "what about you?" comments.

The parent rant:

I think I want to stop socializing. And I mean like cutting off all the cheesy smiles and insincere wavings. Because my mum thinks that I treat other people better than her. She thinks I love my friends more than I love her.

But, cut the drama, how the hell do I treat her like a normal person when she's acting like, I don't know, funny? Is that the right term to use? Every time I talk to her; well, fine, 80% of the time; I can't get a decent answer out of her.

Me: And so just now at school, my friends and I were... *talks about school*
Her: Mm hmm.
Me: *finally done* So, where are we going later?
Her: Mm hmm.
Me: Should I just go and die?
Her: Mm hm... What? What were you saying? Sorry I didn't catch that.

AND SHE THINKS THAT I DON'T MAKE AN EFFORT? I mean, if I talk to much about myself, then fine. But what about the other things? Like asking what are we eating later, or what are we going do after that? All "mm hmm", "mm hmm", and "mm hmm". And then she would blame me that I talk to her when her mind is the busiest like I read minds. Then, she'll go on and on and on about how she'll go about her business, how is this going, how is that going and how I should be helping her.

She doesn't listen to what I say, and expects me to listen to her?

I'm fed up already.

The self rant:

None. What? I said I was human.

Okay, so I promised to update on my chicken pox condition. The reason why they asked my family to bring me from Melaka all the way back to Selangor is this:

They were ALL OVER my face. And there are a few in my eye. I could hardly open them. They're also all over my throat and mouth. Had to have a liquid diet for a few days.

Due to my hideousness, I cannot face anyone. I get stared at everywhere I go. I think people must've been thinking that I contracted some kind of dangerously infectious skin disease or something. Therefore, I disguised myself:


The above pictures were days ago. About two days after I return from camp. And this is a picture I took just minutes before this post:


Still hideous, but not as hideous as when the poxes were still fresh.

And when a girl has her beauty robbed from her, you don't wanna go near her. Cause she's gonna be dangerous. Waaaaaay too dangerous for you to handle. Rawr!

And now in the story of Beauty and the Beast, the Beast changed its sex.

P.S.: I'm going back to national service tomorrow, which is Saturday. Gotta be there before 5.30pm.


~ Angelina

So I was sent back from the national service cause I got chicken pox. Feeling worse as the days pass.

I feel horrible. The lumps are all over my throat. Every swallow is a battle. A painful one.

Will relate the full story later. Got sent home to sleep.

~ Angelina.

I'll be serving the national service for the next three months. I'll be back on March 11 (if nothing goes wrong). Please pray that you don't see me in the papers.

GOODBYE EVERYONE!!! *wipes tears*

P.S.: Please leave good luck wishes in my comment box =x

So I decided it is time to redesign my blog, thanks to the bunch of free time I have in my hands. I finally found a picture of a street *ahem*...trail...*ahem* but it was kinda blurry, and it wasn't even misty. Thanks to photoshop, a sharpened and now misty street (fine, trail) is now the header of my blog! It looked nice when I first tested it out on my template-tester blog, but when I transferred it here and added those widgets, it looks clogged up! :(

Anyhow, what do you think? Is it better? Worse? I think the colours are a little weird, but I can't think of how to recolour them so I just left it like that. Leave me a comment and tell me what you think :) *waits for a once-in-a-blue-moon visitor to rate*

~ Angelina

I was on Facebook, and a Turkish guy added me. Here's a pic of our short chat.


Someone just can't wait for the Christmas turkey to be served.

~ Angelina

Things are not always what it seems to be. True. Are people always who they seem to be? I don't think so. I personally am incapable of expressing myself through words of mouth, though the thought exists. However, by putting thoughts into words, such as this post, makes expression possible. I wish I were better in words vocally, however, because I fail to communicate myself well to others, and I think that it has caused anger build-up. I think I need to join some anger management programme or something, because my blood seem to boil with the simplest spark of fire. I just feel so... angry at times. Maybe my blog is the perfect dose of medicine!

Every time we see a smile on someone's face, do we ever stop to wonder if the same smile is in the person's heart? No. Usually we assume that what we see is the truth. And sometimes we get highly jealous of that assumed truth, or in some cases, make more assumptions out of the assumed truth. For instance, if you are trying to beat someone in the sense of wealth (without the knowledge of that person), displayed through actions and not words, such as working towards buying a bigger car than the person; and one day that person comes to you with a smiling face and chats at usual, while still having a bigger car than you, what do you think is the reason behind that smile? Is it a I'm-so-happy-to-see-you smile? Is it a I'm-just-having-a-good-day smile? Or is it a I'm-still-better-than-you-smile? Actually, either of them has the same possibility and probability of truth than the others, but the urge of trying to beat that person usually clouds your thoughts, automatically making the third reason your assumed truth. Isn't it fascinating how the human mind works? From just a plain smile, so many meanings can be derived from it, and there are a million and one possible reactions to the derived meanings.

Ahh... Isn't simplicity waaaay too complex to understand? :)

~ Angelina

SPM is finally over. And I'm not impressed with what I've done. But what the heck, what's done is done. Now I'm facing a transition, an age transition, from teenagerhood to adulthood. I prefer to see it as a successful escape from the Dark Ages, the age where people are forced to do things they hate, like studying. I don't mind studying actually, I can even love it, it's just that I hate studying what I'm forced to study, and not what I like. But then, what the heck again, it's over!

AND... I'm due for national service at the end of this year. Gotta report in on the 27th of December. My camp's at Melaka, on a Chempedak Mountain (Bukit Chempedak). Too bad it's not Bukit Rambutan - I'M A HUGE RAMBUTAN FAN!

Feeling lazy, might update again somewhere before 27th of December. Ciao.

~ Angelina

Quarrelling. Seems to run in the family. Is it because of the surname QUAH? Quahrellings.

It makes me sad that I always have quarrels with my mum. She just doesn't want to admit that she is in the wrong and the word "sorry" does not exist in her vocabulary. Every time something goes wrong, the finger points to me, the shouting is towards me, and the blame is put on me. Sometimes it makes me wonder, if I am dead, will all these still happen? Is it only then she will realise that I am not the cause of her "misery"?

Another quarrel, yesterday. With the tone sounding like I murdered someone, she blamed me for something she THOUGHT she asked me to do, which she didn't, and after I told her, she did not believe me. Then the you-should-know speech started, and again, my fault. And being the innocent party, I REFUSE to speak or look at her. Well, that's my way of "showing my temper".

Later that night, well, according to my stepfather; she told him that she was sad about my attitude, bla bla bla. And today, I still refuse to initiate any communication with her. And just now, my stepfather gave me a lecture on how I'm supposed to give in BECAUSE I'M THE DAUGHTER.

I AM THE DAUGHTER SO WHAT? ACCUSE ME OF MURDER ALSO MUST NOD?

Of course, I refuse to give in. Then, he started talking about respect. For your information, I RESPECT WITH A REASON LOR! You don't respect me, for what I respect you? I am also a human with feelings, not a wall for you to scream at when you're in a bad mood. Then, he started saying about her not feeling well and stuff, and that maybe all the symptoms "are caused by a growth". Oh, so using death to threaten me now la? Then I also can say, I got depression, I MIGHT SUICIDE ANY MOMENT SO APPRECIATE ME MORE!

And I remember some email she sent me a couple of weeks ago telling me that I was rude. If I am rude, then her? One sentence can kill a man? Hypocrite.

This post is not to show any disrespect or whatsoever, but sometimes she is just too much, and there is just so much I can stand. I need a place to voice out my dissatisfaction and opinions, and thus the existence of my blog.

~ Angelina

If you think being the kid of the person in authority of a certain place is cool, you're wrong. I don't know about the ministers' kids, or Bill Gates' daughter; but I know I hate it when people treats me like a little princess to try and jack their boss, in this case, my mum.

Little presents, delicious treats, ang paus during the Chinese New Year...

"Oh, hey! I got this for your daughter!"

"Wow, she's growing taller!" (Stupid, I know I've never made an inch since Primary 6)

All these, clear signs of insincerity. I mean, if they were so downright sincere, why didn't they give little gifts to others? Their colleagues have children too, why not give them gifts? Why me? At my mum's office, I'm always the smartest, tallest, prettiest, gorgeous person there. Yet people who don't know me wouldn't give me a second glance. If I'm that perfect, don't you think the paparazzi would be all over me?

I hate being the semi boss, they treat me good to get a promotion, they treat me good to get a raise, but since when am I treated good for being myself? I dread stepping into the office on Fridays (earlier school dismissal), the staffs will all still be there. Once I step in they'll go all high-pitched saying, "Oh, look! Here's Madam Julie's daughter! Awww!"

I FEEL UNEASY ONE YOU KNOW?!!

You know, the next time I get a job, I'll know what NOT to do - shower my boss's kid with goodies. You know my future boss's kid, I know exactly how you feel *pats imaginary back*

And my mum says, "Privileged kids don't know how to appreciate."

You know about my previous posts on how I hate studying Chinese language? Now I've totally changed my mind (not the part where I have to memorize 260 idioms for SPM, of course). Studying that language isn't so bad after all, the second worst part has passed, which is my primary school times, and now the last obstacle is waiting! SPM! All I have to do is bear that 260 idioms for another about 4 months, THEN I'M FREE! And I'll be recognized as somebody who can speak and write in 3 languages, and speak 2 dialects in China (Hokkien and Cantonese actually, although I only know some basics for Cantonese, and don't understand what people are saying half of the time :D).

The reason why I have this sudden change of mind is because my Chinese language teacher introduced to us a new university that is going to be opened in Malaysia. It is ranked the 4th best university in China, and even the natives are having a hard time trying to apply to study there. What's better is that - it is compulsory for all students to study in ShangHai for their last year. STILL NEED TO MAKE COMPULSORY MEH? No need to force also I go :D Then maybe I can use this opportunity to penetrate China's market, and then make money, and be rich, and... and...

AND! This is what I call a truely privileged person, not because I'm the kid of a boss, because I'm capable of balancing 3 languages, 3 science subjects, 2 math subjects, history, EST and still having "very good moral values", in a normal-sized human brain! I'm not a genius, I'm not one of the smartie gang, but I'm definitely more privileged. I admit that I don't score good grades for the science subjects, like I said, I'm no genius; but, who says I'm gonna pursue something that I'm not interested in anyway? :D

I just don't think that it is necessary to study hard for something that I don't like, for instance, my science subjects. I wouldn't wanna lose my fun little teenagerhood just to be at the top 10, I know many others who would, but just not me. Maybe I prefer to be like every other teenager and stick with the late hand-ins and rules breaking :) Don't get me wrong, I ain't no big-time rules breaker, but some rules are meant to be broken, so I did just that! Don't look at me with that stare, don't tell me you haven't broken any rules before?

Then again, maybe that's how I stopped myself from being that little emo girl I was years ago. I changed my lifestyle, I changed my perception of school, I changed what I think is more beneficial to me mentally and emotionally. I changed my views on life. I ain't one of the top-scorers like I was before, yet I am undeniably happier. I don't get stressed up on a B anymore. Not even on a C now. I simply just pay more attention, that's all I need for a happy life, and that is how it is meant to be for me, for my life :)